Is it me or you?

In my office there is….for the purpose of this exercise I will call them ‘Sudeepa’ who had shall we say an odour issue.  Not nice when everyone knows and ‘Sudeepa did not!!

Day after day everyone was gossiping behind ‘Sudeepa’ as to why ‘Sudeepa’ wouldn’t do something about it as surely they must know they smell.  After a few months and caught in the photocopying room with ‘Sudeepa’, I finally decided to approach ‘Sudeepa’ and tell of what was being said.  Not something easy to approach and then it hit….Is it me or you….

‘Sudeepa’ was quite shocked as to what I said and was more upset and angry that ‘so called friends’ hadn’t mentioned anything over the years of working together.  ‘Sudeepa’ soon calmed and then the day after it was no longer an issue.  If you ask me it was slightly on the over kill with the cologne, but hey, better to smell strong in a good way than just strong………

All in all I thought the conversation went a lot better than I thought it ever would.  Some of things I learnt (if I had to do this again…but I hope not) are...

1. Don’t point the finger…..hence the heading is it me or you?  If you do, it will just turn into an argument and they will hate you.

2. Never say that some people have mentioned to me about your odour….this gives the impression that people have been talking about them and makes them feel much worse

3.You can always ask them if there is a reason for the smell, it might be a medical issue and by asking them will put them at ease

4. Try to offer them support by saying things like that you yourself had a similar issue some years back and you were so glad that someone did mention it to you, so you could do something about it

5.Needless to say, make sure you have the conversation behind closed doors and not in a public arena.